Better body image after hair transplant

Discuss hair transplant techniques (FUE and FUT), surgeons, results, etc.
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Afro_Vacancy
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Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Afro_Vacancy » 1 month ago

I largely decided to get a hair transplant on cold and calculating grounds: I figured that it was a relatively cost-efficient way to improve my odds with women. Time will tell if that's true. I have not had time to date much recently, and in any case only a small fraction of the hair has grown back, and I have not gotten any good photos yet.

In terms of my own self-image, I was quite worried that I might actually develop BDD. I will never be remotely close to perfect, and I have long had poor body image. A few months ago my therapist and I realized that I could not make a single feature that I liked about myself. I wondered if the hair transplant would metastasize into a perfectionist obsession, and I'd end up looking into nose jobs, mandibular implants, chin implants, cheekbone whatever, etc etc etc. I might have ended up being permanently disatisfied with myself, and perhaps grown more and more anxious with time. It was a plausible risk, as that does seem to happen to a lot of people.

So it's been a wonderful revelation that in recent weeks ... I've actually liked the face looking back at me from behind the mirror. Does that guy actually look good? Kind of above average? Shit, no way. I didn't really expect this. It's a nice surprise. And that's with most of my hair having not yet grown back. But my mind is likely filling in the blanks on my peach fuzz.

I'm also not looking at my reflection as often when walking by windows. I'm not afraid that my forelock has lost yet one more centimeter. I know that this hair transplant was kind of a defensive one, it's set up to buy me some time as other native hairs die. I know this but ... I'm surprised that I seem to actually believe it emotionally.

Tldr; in terms of my self image, this was a great decision.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by rclark » 1 month ago

Afro_Vacancy wrote:
1 month ago
I largely decided to get a hair transplant on cold and calculating grounds: I figured that it was a relatively cost-efficient way to improve my odds with women. Time will tell if that's true. I have not had time to date much recently, and in any case only a small fraction of the hair has grown back, and I have not gotten any good photos yet.

In terms of my own self-image, I was quite worried that I might actually develop BDD. I will never be remotely close to perfect, and I have long had poor body image. A few months ago my therapist and I realized that I could not make a single feature that I liked about myself. I wondered if the hair transplant would metastasize into a perfectionist obsession, and I'd end up looking into nose jobs, mandibular implants, chin implants, cheekbone whatever, etc etc etc. I might have ended up being permanently disatisfied with myself, and perhaps grown more and more anxious with time. It was a plausible risk, as that does seem to happen to a lot of people.

So it's been a wonderful revelation that in recent weeks ... I've actually liked the face looking back at me from behind the mirror. Does that guy actually look good? Kind of above average? Shit, no way. I didn't really expect this. It's a nice surprise. And that's with most of my hair having not yet grown back. But my mind is likely filling in the blanks on my peach fuzz.

I'm also not looking at my reflection as often when walking by windows. I'm not afraid that my forelock has lost yet one more centimeter. I know that this hair transplant was kind of a defensive one, it's set up to buy me some time as other native hairs die. I know this but ... I'm surprised that I seem to actually believe it emotionally.

Tldr; in terms of my self image, this was a great decision.
If you're happy with what you see in the mirror, go for it. You see yourself more than anybody else, and it's really your opinion that counts.

My posts keep "duplicating" here, so I'm not sure if it's a bug, or I'm doing something wrong.

I'm going on vacation.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Rudiger » 1 month ago

I'm sorry Afro you appear to be losing your mind.
Afro_Vacancy wrote:
1 month ago
I have not had time to date much recently
You're always writing shit like this yet have time to be top poster here and on the other 15 forums you visit
So it's been a wonderful revelation that in recent weeks ... I've actually liked the face looking back at me from behind the mirror. Does that guy actually look good? Kind of above average? Shit, no way. I didn't really expect this. It's a nice surprise.
But this is more concerning. It's good to feel comfortable with yourself but if you're reaching delusion then it's only going to result in bottled manic outbursts.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by That Guy » 1 month ago

Rudiger wrote:
1 month ago
You're always writing shit like this yet have time to be top poster here and on the other 15 forums you visit
I like that this guy's go-to claim against me, and basically anyone else committing wrongthink, is that we spend "too much time" on these forums.

Most of us, such as myself, you etc. have a post average of 1.3 - 2.3 per day. He has 3.2 per day and over 1600 posts. The rest of us are at like 1100 or so.

Projection.

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by rclark » 1 month ago

Rudiger wrote:
1 month ago
I'm sorry afro you appear to be losing your mind.



You're always writing shit like this yet have time to be top poster here and on the other 15 forums you visit



But this is more concerning. It's good to feel comfortable with yourself but if you're reaching delusion then it's only going to result in bottled manic outbursts.

You have more points then most people here. Are you jealous of Afro_Vacancy? Or are you just competing with him?

All my posts are going twice, because the @Admin finds this funny.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Rudiger » 1 month ago

rclark wrote:
1 month ago
You have more points then most people here. Are you jealous of Afro_Vacancy? Or are you just competing with him?

All my posts are going twice, because the @Admin finds this funny.
But I wouldn't constantly remind everyone how busy I am when I regularly post here, which is the point. Any time Afro can pry himself away from the forum for more than a week he always reminds us how incredibly busy he is, I bet he intentionally takes time off just to not look like such a loser.

But my other point about his looks was from genuine concern, and I know what afro would say to it "you expect to be helpful while opening with an insult?", well take the point or leave it, but lately you seem delusional and even a bit manic, delusions of grandeur as well. Obviously I don't care deeply what happens but I think I should at least speak the truth here.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by yettee » 1 month ago

Rudiger wrote:
1 month ago
Obviously I don't care deeply what happens
:(

But seriously, there are a lot of posts in this forum that are off the deep end, I dont think this is one of them. The dude thinks he might look "kind of above average". That doesnt sound delusional.
Last edited by yettee 1 month ago, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by C4L » 1 month ago

lol exo is salty in the reps of OPs post
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Afro_Vacancy » 1 month ago

yettee wrote:
1 month ago
:(

But seriously, there are a lot of posts in this forum that are off the deep end, I dont think this is one of them. The dude thinks he might look "kind of above average". That doesnt sound delusional.
I wish that the ignore function worked better here. It'd be convenient if I didn't see the quotes of his posts.

As for my looks Rudiger himself agrees. Sort of, it depends on where he is in his mood fluctuation cycle. But he has previously complimented my appearance in detailed and extensive terms. For example:
Rudiger wrote:
1 year ago
There is a world of difference between the 2nd and 3rd photo in this thread, not just in terms of a slimmer face and better stubble but the expression and (dare I say it) confidence. You no longer look remotely scared of the camera, and this probably rubs off in the way you talk and act in other ways.

Also the 2nd picture of you with a dog, I know that's your better temple but that looks pretty damn good, it's probably a bit dark to tell the density in that shade but fuck it, looks well.

Well done, it's absolutely a looks max. Take your 45 likes and party.
You might ask "Which is the real Rudiger? The one that praises Afro's appearance or the one that criticizes Afro's appearance?" The answer, obviously, is that they're both the real Rudiger.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Arjen » 1 month ago

yettee wrote:
1 month ago
:(

But seriously, there are a lot of posts in this forum that are off the deep end, I dont think this is one of them. The dude thinks he might look "kind of above average". That doesnt sound delusional.
How to put this... I joined HairLossTalk and this forum after stumbling upon them searching for dating chances of bald heads, quickly noticing bluntness (toward oneself and the dating scene in general) that I barely encounter in real life.
Given my overarching issue (what’s my SMV? Are the women I tend to be attracted to “realistic”?), I took the opportunity to have my looks assessed (though only through pics obviously) by (then) strangers I deemed to be as candid as they get, as people from real life will sugarcoat you and/or take your personality into account, which interestingly does matter even regarding your looks outside a dating context.
Funnily enough, even though I was new to them and specifically asked for frank assessments, I still think I got more benevolence than I’d get if people were a 100%, let alone in a dating context. I think it’s nice, and I think it’s human(e).

Having said this and acknowledging Afro’s attempts at looksmaxing: it’s not pleasant at all to say this, but yes, I do think assuming his looks are above average would be delusional by afro. And yes, I do think you are sugarcoating him, subconsciously or consciously, even if it’s for yourself; I ‘ve seen this many time: I’ll rate Arjen/XY a 6, so I can be a 7 or at least a 5. I’m sure you get what I mean.

It's funny, the only person on here who I’d think would completely honest in rating me would be Pat and ironically I’ve been reluctant to ask him for that very reason.

I guess it would be ok for afro to regard himself as average looking, as he’s done in previous posts, though we can’t fail to see his SMV is not reflective of that of an average man (or at least of how the SMV of an average guy “should” be), but I agree that it probably won’t hurt to feel that way about yourself rather than feeling ugly.

But above average…it reminds me of Fred’s stories about when he was on medication and knew no shame and self-awareness, making a fool of himself – only for reality to kick in soon enough and biting him in the ass.

I’m aware that my remarks may be linked to my posting history, which indicates frustration in the dating field, but if anyone thinks I’m just trying to put another man down, I can safely say: no. In fact, if anything, I’d be happy as fuck if Afro were seen and treated as above average and dating attractive women. Not because I like him such much, but because it’d encourage me, leading me to think I may not be so right after all in assessing today’s dating dynamics.

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Rudiger » 1 month ago

yettee wrote:
1 month ago


:(

But seriously, there are a lot of posts in this forum that are off the deep end, I dont think this is one of them. The dude thinks he might look "kind of above average". That doesnt sound delusional.
He's rating himself up half a point a month recently, and obviously there isn't a drastic change he still looks the same, his transplanted hair hasn't even grown in yet and he's gone from initially saying he's an unattractive guy, to average, to now above average? It's delusional, and it will only get worse from this manic high.
Afro_Vacancy wrote:
1 month ago


I wish that the ignore function worked better here. It'd be convenient if I didn't see the quotes of his posts.

As for my looks Rudiger himself agrees. Sort of, it depends on where he is in his mood fluctuation cycle. But he has previously complimented my appearance in detailed and extensive terms. For example:



You might ask "Which is the real Rudiger? The one that praises Afro's appearance or the one that criticizes Afro's appearance?" The answer, obviously, is that they're both the real Rudiger.
Oh the exposure!

So I guess you're going to use my positive points against me? I still stand by that post, and I'm not finding the contradiction, and you haven't actually spelled it out, you've just quoted a complimentary post, and implied that I was saying you're some sort of Chad lite because you improved from previously.

I said you improved your looks and from those pics at the time I still stand by that, but as I wrote to yettee, you went from saying you're a 4, to 5, to now 5.5 ish kind of sort of? What's next? And all when nothing drastic has really changed.

You're such a bullshit artist in how you phrase and imply things, it really is manipulative and calculating, you say I agree "sort of" because you know you're absolutely bullshitting and then you base your whole point on this "sort of" point. And I hate the way you phrase things to this audience you imagine "you might ask yourself" fuck off, Jesus Christ.
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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Exodus » 1 month ago

C4L wrote:
1 month ago
lol exo is salty in the reps of OPs post
i like afro but its crazy to act like this over a norwood 2-3, that's full head to most
Last edited by Exodus 1 month ago, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Hairblues » 1 month ago

Rudiger wrote:
1 month ago
I'm sorry afro you appear to be losing your mind.



You're always writing shit like this yet have time to be top poster here and on the other 15 forums you visit



But this is more concerning. It's good to feel comfortable with yourself but if you're reaching delusion then it's only going to result in bottled manic outbursts.

Using words like delusion and manic outbursts sound like you think he’s mentally ill.

Also are you really actually concerned for him? To me it just sounds like his posts annoy you.

Added in 8 minutes 48 seconds:
yettee wrote:
1 month ago
:(

But seriously, there are a lot of posts in this forum that are off the deep end, I dont think this is one of them. The dude thinks he might look "kind of above average". That doesnt sound delusional.
It sounded like he had a good day and felt good about himself. Like he’s questioning if he’s as bad as he thought. SOMETHING many have said to him, he’s not as bad as he thought.

I don’t think he reallly thinks he’s above average BUT i also think his opinion of average looks tends to be much lower than others. (At least that’s my memory from a few years ago)

What I think of as an average guy I know was higher or better looks than what a lot of HairLossTalk people thought.

It’s all so fucking subjective that we sometimes sound like idiots using the terms and the rankings .

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by blackg » 1 month ago

Some of the assumptions being made in this thread are concerning

rclark wrote:
1 month ago
I'm going on vacation.
Australia?
For the love of South Western skies.

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Re: Better body image after hair transplant

Post by Rudiger » 1 month ago

Hairblues wrote:
1 month ago
Using words like delusion and manic outbursts sound like you think he’s mentally ill.

Also are you really actually concerned for him? To me it just sounds like his posts annoy you.
Actually yes but like I already said, I'm not pretending I'm losing sleep over it, it's just that I've noticed it from his posts in the last few months.

I can be both annoyed by his posts and somewhat concerned for him, while delusional people are annoying, I also know that for them it can lead to a really tough time. I'm thinking specifically of a sort of friend who is always in his own bubble, and inevitably puts himself through hell.

I don't know if it sounds like I'm saying he's mentally ill, I don't know if those things make him officially classified as mentally ill, maybe, but it doesn't really matter either way? I'm definitely not using mental illness as an insult, but the manipulative posting style, intentionally quoting me in a way that knows isn't proving anything but might mislead others, this I'll insult him for.

But no, I'm not insulting him for starting to go delusional (or already hit it) or losing his mind, I'd like him to wake up and acknowledge, this is crazy. You look practically the same as 2 years ago but less weight, a good looksmaxx (which I still agree he did) usually can only move you up a small amount in terms of attraction.
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