If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

Discuss everything else: politics, society, culture, science, philosophy, ideas, etc.
User avatar
Eren
Hair Loss Newbie
Hair Loss Newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: 1 year ago
Reputation: 37
Norwood: NW2.5
Regimen: Finasteride

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12223

Post by Eren » 1 year ago

Suppose you could truly go back in time, and would not lose all knowledge of the future, so you have the ability to correct your "mistakes."

Is there anything you would have changed and if so what exactly?

For me, I would go back in time to my late teens in 2009/2010 and get on finasteride immediately in 2011 (after going to a different GP who would be more helpful).

Second, I would do much more in my uni years in terms of personal development.

Both these things (especially the hair) would allow me to still have that feeling of being able to enjoy life.

With hair, my life would exactly be what it was before. Mere average (perhaps even less) but I was content with it.

User avatar
Admin
Forum Administrator
Forum Administrator
Posts: 2025
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 5151
Norwood: NW2.5
Regimen: 3 FUE hair transplants (5124 grafts), 5% minoxidil, Nizoral shampoo, hope.
Location: Belgium
Age: 30
Contact:

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12224

Post by Admin » 1 year ago

Honestly? Nothing, and certainly not the actions I've undertaken or the (sometimes huge) mistakes I've made during my hair loss nightmare, I would simply not be the person I am today without them. Thank God none of the mistakes were fatal or irreversible.

Other than that I dread at the thought of changing one tiny variable that would cause me not to meet my fiancée, or even prevent me from working for my current employer.

My only regret is that I always feel "behind schedule" when it comes to my movie watchlist, my video game backlog or my music practice. When I look back, I wish I could harmlessly replace the time I spent procrastinating or just mindlessly refreshing my Facebook feed by those activities.

Welcome to the forum by the way :).
:christian-cross:

User avatar
Char
Hair Loss Novice
Hair Loss Novice
Posts: 71
Joined: 1 year ago
Reputation: 214
Norwood: NW5
Regimen: Nothing.
Location: Eastern Europe

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12228

Post by Char » 1 year ago

Prior to hair loss I was considered very good looking. That was 17 year old me, the last year I looked good, the year before male pattern baldness hit me like lightning.
Now uni girls just laugh at my balding rat's nest. I went from being a shy soyboy xD who had fangirls to being some balding weirdo who has no friends xD.

I now have enough knowledge and will, but it's all useless when you're a bald guy. Looks are that important to a person. if you look like a shitty weido, do not even think about having a normal life, people won't like you or having you around.

User avatar
Eren
Hair Loss Newbie
Hair Loss Newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: 1 year ago
Reputation: 37
Norwood: NW2.5
Regimen: Finasteride

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12238

Post by Eren » 1 year ago

Char wrote:
1 year ago
Prior to hair loss I was considered very good looking. That was 17 year old me, the last year I looked good, the year before male pattern baldness hit me like lightning.
Now uni girls just laugh at my balding rat's nest. I went from being a shy soyboy xD who had fangirls to being some balding weirdo who has no friends xD.

I now have enough knowledge and will, but it's all useless when you're a bald guy. Looks are that important to a person. if you look like a shitty weido, do not even think about having a normal life, people won't like you or having you around.
Hair loss kind of destroyed my motivation and the feeling of enjoying life. male pattern baldness started at 18/19 with me :worried: :worried: . I was in a much darker place around 2013. Finasteride has definitely helped significantly, but the quality of the straw hair is pathetic and it looks weak instead of aesthetic.

My biggest issue is I am kind of stuck in between. I am not really bald but my hair is useless. You can't really run your fingers through the hair (it's too weak to even do that lol).

The sides are very thin (severe retrograde alopecia). Due to APKH (Acquired Progressive Kinking of the Hair) my donor hair at the back also has changed in texture. Furthermore, the angle of growth has changed so my hair looks much flatter. An hair transplant is pretty much impossible (though I am still considering it).

Oh yeah, NW2.5 but diffuse (as you could have guessed because of the straw like weak lusterless hair I described earlier in this post).

I tried the beard cope. Men commented on how great my beard looked like without me asking anything obviously. So I guess they truly thought the beard looked good. But, in my experience, no girl gave a lot of f about the beard.

Men: "wow that beard looks good, how did you do that"
Men2: "damn, the beard came out really well, no homo, but it looks good, serious"
Girl: "..."


Added in 1 minute 10 seconds:
Admin wrote:
1 year ago
Honestly? Nothing, and certainly not the actions I've undertaken or the (sometimes huge) mistakes I've made during my hair loss nightmare, I would simply not be the person I am today without them. Thank God none of the mistakes were fatal or irreversible.

Other than that I dread at the thought of changing one tiny variable that would cause me not to meet my fiancée, or even prevent me from working for my current employer.

My only regret is that I always feel "behind schedule" when it comes to my movie watchlist, my video game backlog or my music practice. When I look back, I wish I could harmlessly replace the time I spent procrastinating or just mindlessly refreshing my Facebook feed by those activities.

Welcome to the forum by the way :).
Thanks for the welcome. Kind of had a break of 6 to 9 months from HairLossTalk and suddenly everyone left that forum lol. Same Eren from HairLossTalk.

User avatar
koolaidshade
Hair Loss Enthusiast
Hair Loss Enthusiast
Posts: 313
Joined: 1 year ago
Reputation: 495
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: semen retention, real social dynamics, 12 rules for life

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12240

Post by koolaidshade » 1 year ago

well if I were to go back to middle/high school:

-ignore that girl on the soccer team and go for cute girls that were actually into me
-take vitamin k2, zinc, magnesium, vitamin e, vitamin d, calcium, etc during puberty in the hopes that my bones (jaw, height etc) would grow more.
-do hiit instead of remaining skinnyfat/chubby-muscular until college
-Get even more scholarships and probably do a combined bachelors/MBA program or something

User avatar
justin
Hair Loss Rookie
Hair Loss Rookie
Posts: 147
Joined: 1 year ago
Reputation: 257
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: Nothing

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12255

Post by justin » 1 year ago

Eren wrote:
1 year ago
I tried the beard cope. Men commented on how great my beard looked like without me asking anything obviously. So I guess they truly thought the beard looked good. But, in my experience, no girl gave a lot of f about the beard.

Men: "wow that beard looks good, how did you do that"
Men2: "damn, the beard came out really well, no homo, but it looks good, serious"
Girl: "..."
I go up 2 full points with a beard lol. It almost transforms me into a different person. Whenever I send my homies clean shaved pics they always go "holy shit, never shave your face again" etc. xD Girls ranked it: heavy stubble > light stubble > clean shaved, so they seem to be on the same page.
Even when I’m lying on my back I’m never backing down.

User avatar
Guest-4
Hair Loss Guru
Hair Loss Guru
Posts: 1927
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 5357
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: 1 ml of 5% liquid minoxidil, includes ~20 mg of RU58841 58841; nizoral 3x/week, dermarolling (1.5 mm) 1x/week

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12257

Post by Guest-4 » 1 year ago

Eren wrote:
1 year ago
Suppose you could truly go back in time, and would not lose all knowledge of the future, so you have the ability to correct your "mistakes."

Is there anything you would have changed and if so what exactly?

For me, I would go back in time to my late teens in 2009/2010 and get on finasteride immediately in 2011 (after going to a different GP who would be more helpful).

Second, I would do much more in my uni years in terms of personal development.

Both these things (especially the hair) would allow me to still have that feeling of being able to enjoy life.

With hair, my life would exactly be what it was before. Mere average (perhaps even less) but I was content with it.
Welcome to the forum.

If I could go back in time, I would do many things differently. Are you thinking of any particular age range? I'm weary of going through my whole life and not writing a 22,000 word @Rudiger-esque post ;-)

User avatar
Rudiger
Hair Loss Guru
Hair Loss Guru
Posts: 1352
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 3783
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: Finasteride, RU58841, minoxidil, Biotin, Dermarolling, Nizoral

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12259

Post by Rudiger » 1 year ago

Afro_Vacancy wrote:
1 year ago
Welcome to the forum.

If I could go back in time, I would do many things differently. Are you thinking of any particular age range? I'm weary of going through my whole life and writing a 22,000 word Rudiger-esque post ;-)
Do it mane, it's therapeutic
Look, fat...

User avatar
Guest-4
Hair Loss Guru
Hair Loss Guru
Posts: 1927
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 5357
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: 1 ml of 5% liquid minoxidil, includes ~20 mg of RU58841 58841; nizoral 3x/week, dermarolling (1.5 mm) 1x/week

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12261

Post by Guest-4 » 1 year ago

OK ...

Well, the most obvious one is that if I could, I would invest in Amazon, Dell, Facebook, Apple, Google, etc at the right times and thus make a lot of money. But that example is so obvious that it's boring. So here goes ...

Before puberty
Not much. It's also hard to imagine myself as an 8 year-old having that much wisdom. I think that I would have done more homework in French and Hebrew classes so as to learn the grammar and language (respectively) better. I might have begged my parents to send me to summer camp more often. Summer camp was painful and scarring as a kid as I was always unpopular, but it was also good social skills development as I got to interact with different people.

High school
Don't bother worrying about popularity at all. It's irrelevant as it's an artificial environment that evaporates upon graduation. Simply focus on having fun with people. Study harder in French and Hebrew class. Learn to code, earlier and better. Do more sports.

My first part time job was scooping ice cream a few months prior to my 18th birthday. If I could it again, I'd find a part-time job earlier. It builds social skills, life experience, and gets some money in the bank.

On the other hand, a lot of my time in this period was spend devouring newspapers, magazines, and playing Age of Empires II. The first two gave me a lot of the literacy, breadth of knowledge, and the world view that I have today. The latter one taught me a lot about life, as I went through the whole cycle of being a noobie, an intermediate, a rising intermediate, a world-class expert, and then a slow has-been who talks a lot. I learned what it means to master something, and the amount that it takes in both effort and luck. I also got to know some "friends" all over the world, it represented an expansion of my social sphere. One friend I still keep in touch with. Real life friends have told me that back in my age of empires days, I was racist against Koreans. I don't recall that, but I'm willing to believe them.

College:
Take a programming course or two earlier, and take them more seriously. Programming is the new English & Mathematics. Take a couple humanities electives, in order to develop that side more and meet more people. On the other hand, that's not too realistic as I was working all of the time. Perhaps I would have been better off simply doing honors physics rather than joint honors mathematics and physics. Some of the math courses inform my thinking (e.g. abstract algebra, numerical methods), others, such as metric spaces, number theory, measure theory, set theory, do not. I'm pretty sure that I've never used any of the material from complex variables and transforms class aka advanced calculus II.

High school and college and after:
Take better care of my health. Back around 2002 or so it was fashionable to wear a backpack with one strap. I did that and I often carried too many books. I should have never done that, it was a waste and bad for my body to apply so much one-sided pressure. I should have eaten better and exercised more as well, but I think that the simple ergonomics change would have gone a long way.

I wish that I had discovered intermittent fasting earlier. It is such an incredibly effective and powerful health intervention. I wasted years trying to lose weight with cardio + calorie control, and that was toxic for me in the long run. Intermittent fasting is more effective, it probably preferentially cuts organ fat, it's easier, and it has less risk of leading to hernias and bulging disks.

With women:
Try online dating earlier (maybe in 2005), just get more experience, don't put as much effort into it, and be a little more aggressive/confident in a few contexts.

Clothing:
Spend less money on clothes while fat, its wasteful and useless. Also, I now know of better places to shop for clothes at, where they sell better clothes for less money. But of course, that's some ridiculous hindsight.

Movies and cultural appreciation:

Start listening to director's commentaries on DVDs earlier, it's a great way to learn about the filmmaking process and thus get more appreciation. The general public believes that good movies come down entirely to having better actors and better special effects: that's incorrect. Maybe join a discussion community earlier, in order to explore ideas.

Looks:
Grow a beard earlier; get on minoxidil earlier, maybe age 23 rather than 31 or whatever, be thinner to the extent that this was feasible, start brushing and flossing my teeth regularly at an earlier age,

Other:
Talk to my dad more. He's dead now. I can't talk to him anymore. I wonder what his time was like under the German occupation of North Africa, and what he did during his 20s in Paris. I'll never know, the knowledge is gone forever as my mother is completely unreliable.

Added in 9 minutes 44 seconds:
Bonus / Edited to add: Take more screenshots of conversations with @blackg back in the day when he was not trying to put on a persona; take down the contact information of some great hairlosstalk posters so that we could invite them here, such as Dench and Parisienne and IdealForehead; post fewer photos and less personal information on hairlosstalk. I have a lot of politically incorrect writing over there, and some commentary on my dick. I'm worried that one day somebody will find it and try and shame me.

Up next, I realize that the above post makes me seem like a total fuck up who has always taken the wrong decision in life at every turn, lol. So what I will do as a follow-up is write up about some decisions and effort investments that I'm glad to have taken as they worked out.

User avatar
kj6723
Forum Moderator
Forum Moderator
Posts: 382
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 895
Norwood: NW1.5
Regimen: dutasteride, minoxidil, nizoral

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12263

Post by kj6723 » 1 year ago

I'm of the same camp as @Admin that I believe everything happens for a reason, even the things we don't like or understand, but for the sake of the activity, I will participate

The short version:

Be more reckless in highschool in a lot of ways. Tell more people to fuck off. Enjoy romantic/sexual relationships with the average chicks who were into me I mostly ignored due to holding out futile hope that one of the hotter chicks would notice me. Be more active with sports. Get into fights with assholes even though I would have gotten my ass beat horribly (I weighed like 100 lbs)-at least I would have gone down as a martyr :lol:

Save WAY more money. My brother for example enjoys pretty incredible financial freedom simply due to being extremely frugal for the first 25-30 years of his life, he's never had any kind of very impressive salary, he just didn't waste money and now he basically does whatever the fuck he wants

Oh, and because it's a hairloss forum, of course I would start dutasteride in my late teens/early 20's

Added in 5 minutes 2 seconds:
Afro_Vacancy wrote:
1 year ago
I wish that I had discovered intermittent fasting earlier. It is such an incredibly effective and powerful health intervention. I wasted years trying to lose weight with cardio + calorie control, and that was toxic for me in the long run. Intermittent fasting is more effective, it probably preferentially cuts organ fat, it's easier, and it has less risk of leading to hernias and bulging disks.
Fasting is such a game changer....it's almost mind blowing to me the way it allows you to lose/maintain a healthy weight while also engorging and binging on massive amounts of delicious food. I fucking love it

Guest-3
Hair Loss Expert
Hair Loss Expert
Posts: 792
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 2465

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12269

Post by Guest-3 » 1 year ago

Eren wrote:
1 year ago
Suppose you could truly go back in time, and would not lose all knowledge of the future, so you have the ability to correct your "mistakes."

Is there anything you would have changed and if so what exactly?
I would love to go back to May 2008 and stop myself from taking Finasteride which triggered reflex hyperanrodenicity in me that resulted in my hair receding from NW0 to NW2. I actually day dream about it every day. I had no need to take finasteride but I foolishly took it as a "preventive measure". By far the most idiotic thing I have ever done. The quality of my life has gone down significantly because of that one mistake.

However, I don't discourage people from taking finasteride as most people do benefit from it. I am just one of the unlucky ones who experienced horrific side effects.
Trump 2020

User avatar
Rudiger
Hair Loss Guru
Hair Loss Guru
Posts: 1352
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 3783
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: Finasteride, RU58841, minoxidil, Biotin, Dermarolling, Nizoral

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12271

Post by Rudiger » 1 year ago

Absolutely nothing except that I would invest in Amazon, Dell, Facebook, Apple, Google, etc at the right times and thus make a lot of money. :smirk:
Look, fat...

User avatar
Guest-4
Hair Loss Guru
Hair Loss Guru
Posts: 1927
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 5357
Norwood: NW2
Regimen: 1 ml of 5% liquid minoxidil, includes ~20 mg of RU58841 58841; nizoral 3x/week, dermarolling (1.5 mm) 1x/week

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12273

Post by Guest-4 » 1 year ago

kj6723 wrote:
1 year ago
Be more reckless in highschool in a lot of ways. ...

Save WAY more money.
I kind of feel like you're contradicting yourself !

Added in 53 minutes 24 seconds:
Some random good decisions that I've made:

1) Got into video games, message boards, and later films as hobbies. These have all helped me explore a different side of myself and become a more complete person. They also make for a decent pastime.

Special thanks to: Super Mario Kart, Final Fantasy II and III or rather IV and VI, Age of Empires 2, Babylon 5, Breaking Bad, The Wire, Six Feet Under, Smallville, Spider Man, Exo Squad, Sailor Moon, Man of Steel, Terminator, Alien, Star Wars, Far From Men, The Sessions, Room, Amour, all of the more competent world war II documentaries, Free Dominion, Hairlosstalk, Mrfixitonline, Impactofhairloss, hfboards, pajiba, birthmoviesdeath

[I'm sure that I forgot many.]

2) I did not own a smart phone during graduate school, and I did not have internet in my apartment. That likely helped me focus, and indeed I did very well.

3) I just farted. It felt like a nice relief, and there's nobody around anyway.

4) There was this girl that I liked a lot from 2005 to 2007. A lot of people told me to forget her. She turned me down a few times. But I persisted in a casual non-creepy way. As in we became friends, but I always gave her space, I did not email her multiple times per week, etc. It took a lot out of me. But it paid off and we did have a relationship for a few months in 2007. Those are likely the happiest moments of my adult life.

5) At some point I learned to acknowledge error and apologize. Partly due to reading the book How to Win Friends and Influence People. A lot of people go through their lives never apologizing and never acknowledging error on anything, it's an ugly look, and it harms them even more than it harms other people, as they become disconnected from reality. Apologizing doesn't just make the other party feel better, it is also a little painful, which may reduce the odds of the mistake being made again in the future.

It did pay off on this forum, about a year ago, when I apologized to a long-term member here, it was good for me, her, and ... probably everybody else. lol.

Though it's important not be a politician about it. A lot of politicians apologize about everything and its phone. It's only helpful if it's an intermediate step toward not repeating the error.

6) Most of my travels have been interesting. I interacted with different people, saw different places, ate different foods, etc. In the past year I've been to New Orleans, Boston, New Mexico, Padova, Heidelberg, Santiago, Seattle, New York City, Salt Lake City (mostly for the Sundance film festival), and it's been great. And though all of those cities are wonderful, I know that there's probably no such thing as the best city in the world for me. That's a delusional bullshit concept. There are simply many places where I could be happy, or miserable lol, perhaps in different ways.

7) Pursued therapy, beginning roughly two years ago. I've seen my therapist a lot ... maybe ~150 hours total? I feel like we're bonded. The exploration has been very helpful in helping me better understand myself, and better interact with others.

8) Getting to say bye to my father before he died. He died of prostate cancer in late 2011 / early 2012. He wasted away for many months, the medical staff was incompetent, and it sucked. But I did get to tell him that I loved him, I took some time off from work to care of him for a bit, and I told him that my favorite childhood memories were of us going to the beach in the summers.

User avatar
Uncle Grandfather
Hair Loss Rookie
Hair Loss Rookie
Posts: 218
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 644
Norwood: NW3
Regimen: 1 mg Finasteride, Saw Palmetto, Nizoral, Regenepure, Alcepin

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12281

Post by Uncle Grandfather » 1 year ago

Threads like these always destroy my soul, but are also good thought exercises as they force me to dig deep through my mind and really sit back and reflect. So I guess without going into super personal stuff:

1. I would have started taking Propecia back in the fall of 2007 when I first noticed my forelock thinning like no tomorrow, instead of thinking it was telogen effluvium and would get better on its own
2. I wouldn't have destroyed my body with junk food as a reaction to losing my hair so young
3. I would have kept in shape and done more sports in high school
4. I wouldn't have taken up smoking
5. I would have spent more time honing my drawing skills
6. I wouldn't have sold my 7th generation consoles (360/PS3/Wii) along with 100+ games
7. I would have backed up the contents of my desktop computer I used daily from 2005-2010 which are now lost forever
8. I would have made an effort to stay in touch with online friends I made in the 2000s (anyone remember Xfire? lol)

While it's good to reflect on the past every now and then, ultimately you're doing yourself no favors constantly thinking about all the "could haves" and "should haves." Live for the present & the future.
Good sense, innocence, cripplin' mankind

supremegentleman
Hair Loss Rookie
Hair Loss Rookie
Posts: 222
Joined: 2 years ago
Reputation: 339
Norwood: NW1
Regimen: nothing

If you could go back in time, what would you do differently?

#12291

Post by supremegentleman » 1 year ago

I would start taking hardcore anti-hairloss drugs at the age of 16.

Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post